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Written on: Sunday, July 20, 2008
Friday was bahas, against TJ, we lost. doesn't matter, though. people still taking photos and stuff so they couldn't have been THAT sad. although haris was crying his ass off right after the thing, crouched in a corner against a wall. he was so sad he had to take painkillers. ok no ah he was just taking his medication, no crying. eh but not fair i thought at some parts the tj speakers made personal insults. and looks like Cikgu thinks the same cos she was telling us yesterday (after kompang, which i'll talk about later) that it was supposed to be intellectual! but why they make personal insults!Time: 10:01 PM nevermind we'll train harder next year and try again. whatever it is, respect to the four bahasers. i find it nervousating to speak malay in front of a large audience and there they were doing what they did. thanks to all the supporters who came down (i've got a list ah, HWOW.) and to those of you who wanted to go but couldn't, we all felt your presence. it was BLOODY creepy, btw. anwaar khairul syafiq syafiq2 taufiks arif irshah farish arina am nurul farhanah izza izzah husena nazlyna ani dian humairah fatin hab fads fizah hijazi in order of the bus and random memory and sorry if i forgot your name i really should not forget but sometimes my mind's a complete blank and i can't recall sorry again yesterday kompang good ah. maryam arina syafiq sadikin zul hijazi danial sufyan n nabhan demam. thanks to yall for playing NOICEly and maryam n arina for fixing the manggar and patiently walking a few miles.and why the hell didn't the GOH (kan't say who in case they chase after me) look at us, he found the floor very interesting. but after that zul and i went to check it out and it WAS very interesting. ho man how did we overlook that all our lives in rj. living in rj since forever ah. so AFTER kompang went to eat some almost crappy finguh food and main bola for 20 mins and lepak all that ah waste time like normal. then syafiq zul hijazi and i went bishan gym blahblah OH ya before that Cikgu met us talk to us long long about bahas and melayu and prizes and future blah and ok then we went gym ah. then went home for no bloody reason felt like shit after asar. tried to stay awake but fell asleep on the couch at 6.30 then my bros cannot keep quiet or lemme alone so i went to my bed slept till next day which is today around seven am. then after subuh STILL wanna sleep so bad but i had to stay awake later i sleep and grow fat then cannot wake up some more waste time seh. then still got madrasah but thats good for your akhirat and its fun so wth. oh ya yesterday on my way home something happened before and in and after i was in the lift. i standing there innocently waiting then from behind i heard a father and son approaching (i heard the steps plus i turned around in case you wondering if i have fusion hearing vision senses thing) then the following all in chinese but i translate for you son pa is this person a malay pa no lah he's indian s but look at his skin so brown must be malay pa no lah he's not. sri lankan. and all this time i kept quite, secretly understanding. inside damn angry ah wanna burst out and shout but skali paiseh etc. (arif this is why i say shuttup in the train serious sia. but coming from me hard to listen ah cos i whole day buat bising.) when provoked or challenged i always wanna be offensive but i've learnt and naturally react passively cos that's the best way. avoid conflict, paiseh, and messing things up. i hate being angry. can feel the syaitan trying to make me do bad things. so i want it to go away. better be cool than go hell right? then in the lift the father press 8 and i pressed 12 but the light for 8 not working and i knew so when i noticed i kept quiet. the son donno so he said in chinese again pa the light not on maybe you never press. and finally i spoke. yeah i the light is spoilt but i think you pressed. you want me to press for you again? and somehow i felt them paiseh. the father kinda stuttered in english ya press ready and pressed again. then skali 8 floor. pa out first then as the boy walk i said btw i'm indian (not angry voice) if got drummer then he'll play the tadum, CHANG! sound but too bad so i just enjoy inside. i damn happy with my reaction. in case you noticed my writing a bit different today cos my fingers n mind tired and my mind is like a blank but my eyes also hurt. maybe cos use com too much lately and also because i collated surveys just now and microsoft word wasn't very friendly IT SUCKED. and btw if its so damn bloody hot in singapore why don't you people walk around in your underwears. and the guys can go topless or wear singlet. and why don't they wear hot shorts too. don't stop at the slippers. PEOPLE. THINK. and btw i'm really confused now and i dunno who to talk to cos i dunno if people will understand or just laugh or whatever. and somehow i keep wondering do people laugh at or with me. am I the joke or do people really feel happy around me. and sometimes when you know something you find out you don't know more and you get more unsure and when you ask people get annoyed. i wish i knew whether people would get annoyed so i don't ask the wrong things. but then who do i ask my unasked questions. maybe there's a way around it but i know whatever it is i must always turn to Allah for assistance and i know no matter what He'll help me. bye off to econs n more work. maybe i'll write like this too i dunno somehow my mind's getting more awake but i'm still thinking like this. i dunno. k now really bye. oh no. wait. i was looking for a new skin cos i think this one'sgetting old cos you have to click so much but i'm still looking and i haven't done the html stuff in awhile so i'll take some long time but i have to study even if i don't i must not waste my time so it'll probably take forever. and all mcs people please ALWAYS check your mail. it sucks when you don't. thanks. k now really REALLY bye and thanks for reading see you tomorrow or maybe another day |
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